My Aikido Home

I experience Aikido as deep physical and spiritual training for me, informing all the other work I do. I train in Aikido (daily if possible) at Open Sky Aikikai in Hillsborough, NC. I feel very indebted to my instructor, Shidoin Steve Kaufmann, 6th dan, for many, many things: he's supported me in more ways that I can count, and he's a wonderful role model. In direct lineage from Chiba, Kanai, and Yamada senseis, he manifests a very friendly, powerful and well-rounded aikido. He energizes a great community of high ranking folks and new beginners... Also, special thanks other advanced students and instructors that have helped me develop my aikido; specifically, Andy, Alex, Charlie, Jason, Josh, Jesse, Katie, and Sarah come to mind at once... and previous Open Sky folks include the inexhaustible Tom Gorman and Jon Presley, now at Hombu. Having traveled a fair bit in aikido, and trained regularly in martial arts since I was wee (around age 8 or so), I can say that in my experience Open Sky has some really special things going on: sincere training with integrity and a welcoming community. Visiting teachers that come have good things to say, and when our students visit other dojos I overhear lots of compliments.

I also currently live in the "dojo house" in Hillsborough with fellow aikidoka and sometimes-teacher Sarah Kaneko, my super good friend and previous relationship partner. Sarah rocks.

Aikido Travels

I've had opportunity to visit a number of dojos both for extended periods of time and brief stays. I started training seriously in Albuquerque, NM, with T. S. Okuyama sensei, and while there, road tripped out to Berkeley to visit Shibata sensei... where I slept on the mat and had some intense run-ins with the intense uchi deschi living there. I was lucky to visit Jim Hauer sensei once or twice, who corrected my ukemi for shihonage very memorably and forcefully.

As much of my close family lives near Philly, I've trained at and briefly stayed a number of times with Donovan Waite sensei at Aikido of Center City. I credit seeing him early in my Aikido career as very formative for my commitment to ukemi practice - at a seminar with dozens of black belts, and I a 5th kyu at the time, he seemed to be the only one able to demonstrate an ushiro otoshi fall and land like a cat. He inspired my practice of ukemi, which has given me great benefit... hopefully my sharing that with fellow students when I have opportunities to teach will pass it on. I highly recommend his two DVD set on ukemi.

New York Aikikai has been friendly enough to allow me to stay there on occasion for a few weeks at a time as a live in student. Hello to Toshi (who first taught me nearly silent breakfalls!), Luis and Sanji, especially. Having stayed there for some time, I was lucky enough to see Yamada and Sugano sensei as well as a host of incredible United States high ranking sensei such as Koningsburg, Pimslar, Ozeki and others.

I have a special place in my heart for O'Connor sensei, author of the very funny and useful Aikido Handbook. He often comes down to Hillsborough when Yamada sensei comes from NY, and always brings a fantastic group of students to practice with.

With a high school friend up in Boston (Hi, Jesse!) who also practices Aikido, I've gone up to visit a number of very fun dojos. Unfortunately, there's some drama up there... but I will say that I've enjoyed my practice at all of those places and great teachers under Kanai sensei.

I've had some not-so-great experiences as well at some dojos. But those will be unnamed. Ask if you'd like stories. One involves listening to a baffling lecture of motorcycle expos, plus-size women's lingerie and folks of small physical size... while on the mat.

Practicing Other Martial Arts

I also do Ashtanga Yoga, the primary series, as taught by a tape by Richard Freedman suggested to me by Tom Gorman a few years ago. I have only practiced on and off for a few years. I really enjoy it, and it does look fancy, but as much as I enjoy the occasional old dubbed kung fu movie...the yoga is nothing like this...and yes, sometimes this happens. :-)

I practice Chen Style Tai Chi under my aikido teacher... and two to three times a year visit my teacher Master Wang Haijun, direct lineage holder under Grandmaster Chen Zhenglei. Though I think we were overcharged significantly, I once watched him eat almost $200 of meat (I had $8 of tofu with Tom Gorman). His body moves incredibly - feeling him is something like wet concrete, or a giant, alive sandbag. As far as my own practice goes, I work on Lao Jia Yi Lu, the Chen short form, and the 56-movement intermediate competition form. I also help teach the Tai Chi class at Duke in the physical education department with Steve Kaufmann, though I'm only just into intermediate at Tai Chi, in my opinion, after a few years of fairly serious practice.

I've goofed off with other folks in Judo and Capoiera as well. I used to teach Duke's Tae Kwon Do club too... but found Tae Kwon Do and Aikido physically incompatible in my body, and had to sacrifice my previous art, Tang Doo So, for Aikido. Given I trained in it for over a dozen years, it was a very meaningful sacrifice and transition for me. It happened after I read, over and over, O Sensei's The Art of Peace and wanted to aspire to its ideals.

Previous Martial Arts

After my parents split and I became less parented by my father, Master Ron Huntley of Chang's Karate became my surrogate male-gendered parent (not necessary, but that's how it worked out), in a sort. He scrutinized my grades, provided ethical teachings, and trained me in Tang Soo Do, Moo Duk Kwan under Grandmaster Tong In Chang. He was the first African American man I had a significant relationship with, and it set me on a path to question why that was. I credit my body awareness, my speed, my early dedicate of my life to service, and my interest in anti-racist education to that significant relationship over almost ten years. While I have not yet tracked him down, may I find him one day to thank him from the bottom of my heart for deeply changing my life toward the good and giving me tools to transform my life from there on out.

Also, thanks to my brother, Tom Fliss, for training with me during that time. We grew up in Tang Soo Do together, and as the older brother, we'd often have to unfairly spar for first place at the end of in-house tournaments. Competition aside, knowing that he and I share the bond of serious training and body knowledge will hold us together, I believe, until the end of our lives. I love him dearly and am so excited to hear him be happy.

On Aikido Training and Class Privilege

No two ways about it, much of the time martial arts training is a thing of privilege. Growing up, my dues were much more than a standard YMCA membership. It takes money, and often a lot of money, to train. Now, that's not always the case... and many of the more diverse-class friendly schools will waive fees for periods of time or work with you privately to make it work during times of financial stress (I know Open Sky does)... but still, many schools do not have explicit sliding scale fees that are common in class-aware social justice organizations. Moreover, traveling costs money - not just the traveling I've done, but just traveling the miles from home to the dojo add up, especially if you're training more than once a day as I sometimes do. And there's the opportunity cost of simply having the "free time" to train. And, with such class privilege sometimes necessary, not surprisingly training can sometimes take race and gender privilege too - since folks that do anti-oppression work like me have an analysis that sees how race, class, gender, and other "isms" are all tied together.

I hope, more and more, well-respected dojos publicize their willingness to work to meet financial needs and explicitly advertise sliding scales. It's certainly difficult, for those instructors hoping to make a modest living on their lifetime dedication to training. But one day, when folks of more class privilege are willing to pay more than they do now, it'll allow for more folks with less wealth means to pay less. That just takes transparency about money, though, which is challenging for many people even with training. May it one day be realized, so that all can train.

...because what's at stake, to me, is something very deep. My lifetime of physical training, I believe, saved my life. I hope to one day offer that opportunity to all willing and interested in the training.